To My Baby Boy

Hello, Friends! Mother’s Day is this Sunday, and of course, my husband and I will be honoring the mothers in our lives and sharing time with them to celebrate over the next week or so. We are fortunate to have 3 moms and we love them all! My mother, Lee; Matthew’s mother, Rosemarie; and Matthew’s stepmother, Ginger. 

Today, I am reflecting on my own motherhood and the person who gave me the title I bear with the utmost pride: my son, Elliott. Becoming a parent changed my life in ways I couldn’t fathom until I got pregnant. In an instant, my own well-being wasn’t nearly as important as my baby’s, and although I was terrified, everything else in my world melted away and all that remained was my child. In time, I heeded the words of wiser moms who insisted that I needed to take care of myself, too, or I wouldn’t be in the best position to take care of him. I’m still working on that…I bet many of the moms reading this are, too. 

When Elliott was just around 14 months old, I created an email account for him and started sending him messages he’d someday read- I had heard of other parents doing this and thought it was a cool idea. Revisiting those words feels just as relevant today as they did 11 years ago.

March 13, 2014

Hi, Baby!

I've been missing you a great deal this week. I always miss you when you're at day care, and I'm at work, but this week for some reason has been harder than others. Maybe it's because as of last Friday (March 7) you started truly walking! We're so proud of you. I hate missing milestones like this. We love watching you toddle around (and open doors!) I wish I could be with you every day, like some stay-at-home moms I know. Please understand that your father and I both need to work full time in order to afford our lives here. We are working toward a better solution, but I may always need to work full time. I wish things could be different. I miss you every minute and always wonder what you're up to. I hope you and George aren't fighting over toys today!

I'm glad you have other children to play with at day care, though, and the staff does care for you very much. Socially, it's a very good thing. I just hope you never forget who is really raising you. We love you more than I am able to express with mere words. You're growing so fast- I'll write again when we reach another big milestone, which will probably be very soon.

xoxoxox~Mommy

April 2, 2014

Hi, Sweetie!

I don't think you've ever "slept through the night" for an entire week, but you've been doing it more often, and it's so great for all of us. Last night, though, was very bad. We weren't sure if you were having a nightmare, in pain from teething, or experiencing separation anxiety, but you were extremely upset. I was confused as to what to do for you, because your doctor thinks we should be letting you get yourself back to sleep at this age, and truth be told, that is the best thing for all of us. I was so very, very tired. I couldn't stand by your crib any longer and try to get you to remain lying down long enough to drift off. I tried, I really did.

Why am I telling you this? I guess because I hope that being exposed to any frustration your father and I feel while we guide you through this crazy life does not later have a negative impact on you. I feel the need to constantly remind you, and show you, that we love you, oh so much. I think episodes like last night are normal for children your age (15 months old), and frustration is normal for parents, too. Most likely you will have no memory of these kinds of nights, and for that I am grateful.

Perhaps someday you will become a parent, and you can look back on this after your own night of frustration, ravaged by sleep deprivation, and know that it's part of the parenting experience, and it's OK. I'm not a perfect parent by any stretch, and I'm constantly learning and evolving. You make me want to be the best person I can be, and I need you to know that, throughout your life, I will make mistakes as your mother and hopefully learn from them. I'm trying so hard to do what is best for you, and not to lose control of myself. I love you so much. 

I hope tonight is a more peaceful night for you, and for your father and me. I will keep striving to find the best ways to help you grow into a happy and healthy person. You're the most important thing in my life and you always will be.

Love,

Mommy

A Mother’s Day Message

To new moms and veteran moms 

To the moms who somehow juggle it all with grace

To the moms who feel like a hot mess much of the time, but still keep it together

To the single moms who do so much of it alone and still manage to be rock stars

To the working moms and the stay-at-home moms managing ALL the things

To the stepmoms who have become essential parts of the family

To the grandmothers who swoop in like superheroes just when they are needed

To the aunties and girlfriends who provide crucial support to the sisters and mom friends in their lives

To the pet moms raising furry babies

To the empty nest moms who are learning how to let go

To the moms who have lost a precious child, but remain strong and honor their lives every day

To the moms who are no longer with us on this earth, but remain forever in our hearts

Happy Mother’s Day